Art Blog

lpbestiary: Deogen, also known as De Ogen (The Eyes) is a...

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 17:48:48 -0400

Deogen, also known as De Ogen (The Eyes) is a malevolent spirit said to haunt the Sonian Forest in Belgium. It is usually seen as an indistinct figure made of fog, followed by several smaller shadowy figures.

The legend of Deogen is said to have originated when a group of nuns found numerous burned bodies of young children in the forest. However, the only record of this case comes from a 1937 book called De Kinderen van Het Bezeten Bos. As such, Deogen is considered more of an urban legend than anything else.

Image source.

Monster master list.

Suggest a spook.

bioniclechicken: Tried going non-set accurate.I liked being set...

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 17:47:01 -0400

bioniclechicken:

Tried going non-set accurate.
I liked being set accurate more.

monoflaxart:Some more woofs

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 17:39:04 -0400

monoflaxart:

Some more woofs

The Bestiary Revamped: Wyville’s Crownjelly

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 15:07:39 -0400

terrible-tentacle-theatre:

Disclaimer: While this article is founded in scientific fact, it contains hyberbole and conscious exaggerations for the sake of comedy. Do not take my ramblings at face value. You can find the sources at the end of the article and tools for scientific fact-checking under the “Learn more” link on my blog.

The old article can be read here.

At long last, today we finally return under the waves, and while we’re at it, why not go full fucking overboard? Here at the Terrible Tentacle Theatre, we pride ourselves on not having any idea what “moderation” means. If we return to the sea, there is only one place to go: down. Way, way down.

Say hello to the bathypelagic zone, the expanse of watery void stretching from 1000 to 4000 meters. Our passengers might want to look out their windows and observe the breathtaking scenery below:

Oh no, you’ve got it all wrong. That’s not your internet being shit again. That’s genuinely how it looks, in real life, when you descend to a depth of 3000 or so meters. Nature documentaries like to put more bioluminescent flecks of organic matter in it than a love-starved grandma does lights on the Christmas tree when her grandkids are visiting. However, in reality, making a 24/7 lightshow out of yourself is a preeeeetty bad idea, since it attracts the immediate attention of pretty much everything with huge fucking teeth in the vicinity. Hint: you’ll get eaten, pretty fast. In fact, this is the actual reason why anglerfishes do their little thing with the glowing lures, because anything and everything bigger than said lures will be attracted to it, allowing the anglerfish to basically pull a “gotcha” and eat them in turn.

My point being, if you see something shiny in the deep sea, do not go to investigate. Whatever is shining that light wants you to go there.

And that is also the prime tactic of today’s specimen, which takes the incredible freedom that comes with living in a realm of eternal darkness and emptiness and uses it to fulfill it’s lifelong dream of being a goddamn Pokemon master. Come with me on today’s adventure and you’ll soon see what I mean by that.

I often joke around about how some particularly strange species we review here look like aliens. However, if aliens did decide to visit Earth, Wyville’s crownjelly (Atolla wyvillei), also known as the atolla jellyfish or coronate medusa, wouldn’t be one of the aliens. It would be the fucking spaceship.

I mean, look at this damn thing. I can’t tell where it begins or ends, but I sure can tell where the fucking cockpit is. That is not how a jellyfish should operate; they should be controlled by a decentralized nervous system, not little green men from Planet Piss Off out to steal our hotdogs and happy thoughts because their planet doesn’t have any.

Of course, the scare factor of a glowing organic UFO mothership straight out of Roswelltunguska, Arizona swimming around in our oceans is somewhat mitigated by the fact that it’s tiny as shit. Standing at a diameter of about 15 centimeters (~6 inches), it’s either not a serious harm to humankind at large or the mothership of the smallest aliens ever. I’m inclined to believe the latter.

*squeaky helium voice* BOW DOWN TO ME PUNY EARTHLINGS

AND STOP LAUGHING DAMMIT

Of course, there is a very good reason for the crownjelly being as small as it is. In the deep sea, you can’t throw a brick without hitting absolute darkness and empty water. You take two steps to the left and BAM- you’ve just ran headfirst into fucking nothing at all. The bathypelagic zone where this thing hangs out on the regular is a really food-scarce place is what I’m getting at. And big bodies being as expensive to upkeep as they are, most deep-sea creatures are actually much smaller than nature documentaries would have you believe.

Another aspect of the deep ocean besides being empty also being darker than a Morlock’s asshole inside a cave. Therefore, any light sticks out like a sore thumb, drawing attention like Kim Kardashian did with that one photoshoot of hers. (Doesn’t matter which one, actually. All of them drew attention.) Wyville’s crownjelly exploits this to show us that these particular aliens aren’t interested in meeting our leader, only in playing Pokemon Go.

The whole entire process of capturing a shiny begins with the jellyfish carelessly frolicking across the deep sea, like all of them youngster with their fancy phones and smartwatches. For some inscrutable reason, this movement is accompanied by a steady red pulsing on the underside of its bell. For what reason, I cannot determine seeing as most creatures at that depth are completely fucking blind to the color red. The one species that can actually see red is one that you really don’t want to attract the attention of. In fact, messing with this guy is such a bad idea that its existence was literally what prompted me to start writing this blog in the first place and it served as the subject of my first Bestiary article.

Wyville’s crownjelly swimming, also known as Local Suicidal Idiot Takes a Walk. I mean seriously, you can’t even say that it doesn’t live in the same place as the loosejaw because both species are cosmopolitan. The only saving throw for the crownjelly is that it lives an average 2000 meters deeper than the loosejaw, otherwise this blaring red light would be the evolutionary equivalent of putting a big flashing “KICK ME” sign around your neck.

The first method of capturing sea creatures to train them and become the very best (like no one ever was) is the series of tendrils hanging from its bell, which the jellyfish uses to filter out and capture small prey animals that have the supreme bad luck to be in its vicinity. The alien abduction parallels are uncanny.

However, a second and much more impressive weapon in its arsenal is the long, trailing tentacle that is clearly visible on the above gif. This is coated in enough adhesive to make a hagfish gag, and the crownjelly uses it to its full extent to sate its rumbling belly. Streaming in the water like the latest shit-tier waifu harem show on Crunchyroll, it becomes an effective hunting tool for the benefit of the jellyfish. Anything snared by this appendage will be subjected to similar treatment that one might expect the villains in a Conan the Barbarian movie to do, being dragged after Wyville’s ruthless motherfucking crownjelly, sometimes for minutes, before it does an acrobatic little pirouette and swallows its helpless, snagged prey. Lovely feeding tactic.

Pictured: Wyville’s crownjelly on the hunt. Sadly it can’t really go “YEEHAW” under the water. Even if it had a voicebox all it would be good for would be gurgling.

However, that is not the most unusual feature about this cruel little cnidarian. There is yet one more trick that this deep-sea flying saucer holds, a trick which catapults it from “moderately interesting predator” right into “Kanto Elite Four” position. And that thing is its lights.

See, vicious as it is towards smaller animals, the crownjelly is actually a dirty, dishonorable coward, being equally afraid of bigger predators. Apparently this tiny creature composed of somewhere around 97% water counts as a delicious treat for some reason, seeing as even large active predators such as deepwater sharks munch on it regularly. (Then again, it is also possible that they’re simply too hungry to care about their record as gourmets with refined taste. This is the desolation that is the abyssal zone, afterall.)

Running from a sufficiently large and starved predator in the middle of a flat-empty expanse of water is, of course, hopeless, especially if you’re small as shit and your method of locomotion is the jellyfish equivalent of flapping your arms really fast to try to fly. Clearly, a different tactic must be employed here since this one is a one-way ticket to the town of Stomach, United States of Shark. And employ a different tactic it does.

Oh, boy, does it ever.

I have previously mentioned that the crownjelly is bioluminescent, and employs this attribute for some nefarous purpose. Of course, this is not the red pulsing I already mentioned, this is a whole ‘nother can of worms entirely. This is one of the most ingenious methods of defense I’ve ever seen.

If some foolish predator gives the atolla chase and inevitably catches it, the jellyfish activates its second, blue set of lights. Once again the UFO analogues become eeriely appropriate as the slightest touch sends the saucer-shaped animal into a frantic siren-like light show.

Recommended listening

This strange eruption of light is no mere panic response. It is a powerful and weird weapon of self-defense, carefully evolved to be as tacky and eye-catching as possible. It’s like a ganguro girl, only bioluminescent.

Of course, you might ask “why would the jellyfish want to be eye-catching? Isn’t being devoured by one predator a big enough problem for it already?” Well obviously it is, but this lightshow is actually its own circuitous path to freedom.

To understand this, picture the following. You are some big mean motherfucker making a living in the deep sea by eating as much as you can find. One day while taking your regular stroll through the absolute crushing darkness, you catch sight of a distinct, circular light in the distance; very flashy and very tasty-looking. You approach to investigate, and find a small jellyfish being caught by a larger and meatier animal.

What do you do?

Eat the jellyfish like a fucking idiot.

Eat the meatier, tastier predator.

If you answered “eat the predator”, congratulations! You’re at least as smart as a fish. And that is, in fact, exactly what Wyville’s crownjelly is counting on. While you’re busy making a meal of its predator, the jellyfish quietly and sneakily fucks off into the abyss before you could think about having it as dessert. And so, Wyville’s crownjelly will live to swim another day, thanks to the power of summoning a big tough animal and pitting it against another ani- OH FOR FUCK’S SAKE IT’S A POKEMON TRAINER.

Do you see why I thought that? If you sail out to sea with Pokemon Go open on your phone, and all gyms on the world oceans are captured by Team Instinct, you know who to blame.

Wyville’s motherfucking crownjelly.

Sources

Encyclopedia of Life

WoRMS - World Register of Marine Species

Ocean Biogeography Information System (OBIS)

Global Biotic Interactions

Widder, E. A. Eye in the Sea, NOAA Operation Deep Scope 2005.

Hunt, J.C. & D.J. Lindsay, 1998. Observations on the behavior of Atolla (Scyphozoa: Coronatae) and Nanomia (Hydrozoa: Physonectae): use of the hypertrophied tentacle in prey capture. Plankton Biology and Ecology, 45, 239-242.

Herring, P.J. & E.A. Widder, 2004. Bioluminescence of deep-sea coronate medusae (Cnidaria: Scyphozoa). Marine Biology, 146: 39-51

jamesmasinoart:For my 3D production class I had to create a...

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 15:05:03 -0400

jamesmasinoart:

For my 3D production class I had to create a three shot short that was a remake of an existing movie scene- with muppets. I ran out of time to do the particle water effects, but this is basically Pacific Rim anyway.

kiing-father: cisnowflake: officialfist: dailytweets: DID HE...

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 14:59:08 -0400

kiing-father:

cisnowflake:

officialfist:

dailytweets:

DID HE JUST DROP AN ELBOW ON A GATOR!?

Yeah? It be like that sometimes

The form. The precision.

monarobot: How to Train your Dragon, Maya style! Their maya names in order (made up by me): Ma'koh,...

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 14:54:36 -0400

monarobot:

How to Train your Dragon, Maya style!

Their maya names in order (made up by me): Ma'koh, Chak Iik’, Xeeh Keeb, Bak’ Polok, Yeh Koh and Puul Múunyal!

✨PRINTS ✨MERCH ✨PATREON ✨KO-FI ✨PORTFOLIO ✨

Light Fury coming soon!

hyenafu: poor ridley http://raizap.com

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 14:53:15 -0400

hyenafu:

poor ridley

http://raizap.com

lovecraftianshitshow: quiyst: charlesoberonn: chefpyro: pure...

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 14:49:36 -0400

lovecraftianshitshow:

quiyst:

charlesoberonn:

chefpyro:

purelyundecided:

tonystark5ever:

lokiperfection:

Loki: Transforms smooth af

Thor: BLAM-O LIGHTNING EVERYWHERE YOU HEARD

poetic cinema

Surprised loki didnt flinch at all with all that lightning coursing around him

he grew up with that guy, he’s used to it

Loki didn’t even transform, his suit was an illusion and he just took it off.

Yeah, Loki just dispelled the illusion, but Thor actually had to change clothes, so he needed the lightning blast to cover the ThunderPenis.

I’m convinced Loki is perma-nude and EVERY outfit you see is an illusion. Why deal with the discomfort of chafing pleather pants when you can just trick people into thinking you’re wearing clothes?

Also, “ThunderPenis” nearly killed me.

Want to learn Sign Language?

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 13:40:38 -0400

study-health:

So I formally took American Sign Language for 2 years because I am in High School and I feel it would be useful to share some Websites, Apps, Videos and other things for people who are interested in learning Sign Language or already know a little bit and are just looking for some links! I did not find these on my own, this is a list a teacher gave me. Hope this can be useful to people and please share so more people are aware of this post in case they are interested in learning! Thank you!

Websites:

-https://www.signingsavvy.com/

-http://lifeprint.com/

-http://aslpro.com/

-http://asl.ms/ (Fingerspelling Practice)

-http://asl.bz/ (Numbers Practice)

-http://www.signlanguage101.com/

-http://www.deaftv.com/

-http://howyousign.com/

-http://aslized.org/ (ASL Literature)

-http://ideafnews.com/

-http://www.oicmovies.com/

Instagram:

@/asl_nyc

@/aslslam

@/signedwithheart

@/equalaccess

Facebook:

-D-Pan

-i Deaf News

-DeafTV

-Deaf Can

-Deaf rock

Apps:

-Sign Language PCS (Free)

-ASL Dictionary from NTID ($1.99)

-Marlee Matlin Signs (Purple - Free version is limited)

-Signing Savvy (Free Dictionary)

-ASL Dictionary - Over 5,000 Signs ($6.99)

Youtube:

-Kelly Greer (ASL Song Interpretation)

-Tiffany Hill (Hearing, Interpreter, ASL Song Interpretation)

-Amber Galloway Gallego (ASL Song Interpretation)

-CHS ASL

-ASL Nook

-Rob Nielson

-Dpan Videos

-Sean Forbes (Deaf, Co-founder of D-Pan, ASL song interpretation)

-Keith Wann (CODA, Comedian, ASL Stories)

-ASLSLAM (Short stories, Discussions, Vocabulary)

-Coda Brothers (Stories)

-Bill Vicars (Lifeprint Lessons)

-Erik Witteborg (CODA, ASL song interpretation and chats in ASL about Deaf-related topics)

spikethebeetle: WE’RE HERE! 24 HOURS LEFT for the Spike...

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 12:24:23 -0400

spikethebeetle:

WE’RE HERE! 24 HOURS LEFT for the Spike Poseable Plush Kickstarter! Time is ticking down to get all sorts of exclusive goodies!
Reblogging this is very appreciated! ♥

multiplegenredisorder:The dog was guiding him.

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 11:22:35 -0400

multiplegenredisorder:

The dog was guiding him.

crabdominalpain: My Favorite SCP has got to be the flock of hyper-intelligent Crows who run a...

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 11:20:32 -0400

crabdominalpain:

My Favorite SCP has got to be the flock of hyper-intelligent Crows who run a Burger King up in Oregon

behindtheballs: dreamsofchaos: older-and-far-away: If you are...

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 10:33:40 -0400

behindtheballs:

dreamsofchaos:

older-and-far-away:

If you are sad today, or hung over, or stressed out, or even if you are fine but could use a giggle, well…kittens on a roomba. NEVER NOT WONDERFUL.

be still my heart

WHEN IT PUSHED THE KITTEN AND IT DOESNT MOVE, JUST SLIDES

GOODBYE TO FUZZY

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 10:31:31 -0400

howtobangyourmonster:

thefuzzycomic:

If the EU Censorship Law is applied, from 24th of July onwards FUZZY will be permanently gone. I will be permanently gone! It becomes illegal to access any other sides than newspaper media sides and big corporative online stores. Thus, I will not have any way to keep publishing or drawing FUZZY.

Webtoons will be gone and I will lose my living from Patreon, too.

So, in a case the shit happens, I want to thank you all for reading FUZZY so far and being so supportive. It’s been fun!

- Niu

————————

You can help, no matter where you live, by signing this petition - please also share it.
If you are EU citizen, you can send email to your MEP here

Here’s full list of how this law, if applied, will affect EU and thus the world.

Signed and shared

We all have a responsibility to defend the freedom of the internet, from anti-neutrality laws to censorship and copyright laws. If there’s anything the last couple years should have taught us, it’s that “oh, that will never happen” is a fool’s excuse. Previously-unthinkable things are happening all the time. DO something.

clockbirds: luminous. half body commission~ > my art tag

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 10:31:00 -0400

clockbirds:

luminous. half body commission~

> my art tag

introvertproblems: suzangean: Introvert vs Extrovert Can you...

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 10:30:14 -0400

introvertproblems:

suzangean:

Introvert vs Extrovert

Can you relate?

roskiiart: soldierpallaton: bad-post-pikachu: MINORS ON TUMBLR BEWARE Keep an eye out for this...

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 10:28:27 -0400

roskiiart:

soldierpallaton:

bad-post-pikachu:

MINORS ON TUMBLR BEWARE

Keep an eye out for this pride flag! If you encounter someone with this pride flag as their icon, do yourself a favor and block/report them. This is the MAP pride flag. For those who don’t know, MAP stands for Minor Attracted Person, more commonly known as a pedophile. The MAP community is filled with adults who openly admit to having sexual feelings towards children, and post about how they fantasize about underaged children. It’s sick and disgusting, and these depraved individuals try and use tumblr as a platform to normalize their perversions. They appropriate the experiences of the LGBT community by feigning systematic oppression, and comparing the rightful societal condemnation of pedophiles to the violent persecution of the LGBT community, which isn’t even remotely comparable. It’s honestly reprehensible that they’d take advantage of pride by making a flag like this. It’s incrediblly dangerous because unifying symbols such as this create a platform for pedophiles to prey on children, and spread pedophilia-enabling rhetoric. Please spread this around if you can, and if you are a minor, don’t bother interacting with these scumbags. It’s not worth putting yourself in danger to call these people out or try to get them to see the error of their ways. Stay safe everyone!

It looks like the “Creator” of the flag is @/dont-mistake-our-geography, she is an avid MAP supporter and possible MAP herself. She has her main blog in her title under “stennastims” which she says she’ll follow from! So, if you get followed from either! Block them!

HOLY SHIT.

Thanks for the heads up!

catchymemes: Conditional Immortality of Lobsters

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 10:28:03 -0400

catchymemes:

Conditional Immortality of Lobsters

ann-fortunately: Spider-Man/Deadpool: Issue #20

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 10:23:45 -0400

ann-fortunately:

Spider-Man/Deadpool: Issue #20